quelquefois

Okay. I hid all of my chocolate bars and my fancy tea, but last week, I left my Lemon-Lime Orbit out on the desk. I know I gave it a scathing review last week, but if I paid $1.50 for these 14 pieces, I am going to chew every nauseating 10.7¢ piece. So, when I come back from a weekend (much like two weeks ago), I didn’t expect 6 pieces to be gone. What the fuck? When did you need to eat 500 pieces of gum? Usually you take one, and you leave.

Thanks, fuckhead. But guess what? There won’t be any more freeloading off me–I’m peacing out of this office on Thursday.

Sincerely,
Going to cut your balls off Jesse-Jackson-style

At first I thought I was just unaware of how much food I eat while working when I came back from a day off from work and noticed that half of my veggie chips disappeared from the container. But this time I’m almost sure that I didn’t eat 90% of my entirely new box of Wheat Thins. You do realise that the box probably cost me around $4.00 (since NYC loves to inflate its prices) and I got to enjoy the equivalent of 50 cents of it, right? Do you also realise that I get paid breadcrumbs compared to what you probably earn? Then, you take those breadcrumbs, and crumble them between your fingertips because the money I get has to fund living in this city.

Do you also know that the second floor often has free leftover food from meetings and conferences? I’ll bet you $20 that the food down there is a thousand times better than my box of Wheat Thins or my veggie chips.

I hate you. I will now begin to hide my food behind the computer.*

Sincerely,
Poor, unpaid–and now snackless–intern

*By computer, I mean somewhere secret so you’ll never find it! HA!

I’m doing everything I’ve wanted to do since struggling through my thesis in March. I haven’t left the house,  and sometimes it seems even the bathroom is too far. I’ve been reading the news, reading magazine articles, browsing graphic and web design sites, writing, organizing my photographs, and listening to wonderful music.

Unfortunately, I could not afford to do most of those aforementioned activities. I have a long overdue project for a professor at Brown. I have been slaving away on a seat (that would better fit a Barbie doll than my ass) for the past several hours trying to finish it by Friday morning. I have to send this, and other things (i.e., that damn $115 parking ticket payment) in the mail. So what is this project I’m working on? I have to code Chinese language government websites to determine whether they have certain features such as: presence of publications, databases, and services (if so, how many? Is there a user fee? Can you pay by credit card? Digital signature?), comment forms, a means of  providing updates to users (e.g., RSS, subscriptions), among other things. It’s a tedious process, but I like the professor and it pays fairly well.

What’s even more painful is that since I do not have an ethernet/wireless connection, I have to use this shitty little USB mobile wireless card that makes me want to peel my skin off while I wait for pages to load. It also does not help when Chinese government websites all look like this. Seriously? Who needs that much text on one page?

Like I could not spend the entire day browsing everything at my fingertips on the internet, I’m also saving some money. After spending over $75 on food within the first few days of being in New York City, I had to check myself. I have reverted to money saving behaviors such as not leaving the house (I’m so fucking good at this) and eating what’s around the house. This includes: eating old berries bought in Connecticut while on my way back to Providence to prepare for moving to New York (translation: pretty fucking old); eating an entire box of Annie’s Macaroni and Cheese for a late lunch so I won’t be hungry at dinner; getting full of of $1 Miller Lites at a bar; and making a huge pitcher of iced tea and drinking it to subside hunger pangs.

All in all, life is pretty balanced. Splurging with frugality, indulgences with work.

GOOD GOD, Rachel’s Yogurt is the best yogurt on the planet. Seriously, I can bring myself to tears when the yogurt touches my tongue. With flavors like Pomegranate Açai, Marionberry Guava, Grapefruit Lychee, and Kiwi Passionfruit Lime, how can you go wrong?! Rachel’s Yogurt hails from the UK, which continues to demonstrate that Europeans know their yogurt. Even if it costs me upwards of $1.39 per container, I will stay true to this brand.

Other awesome flavors include: nocciola, stracciatella, malto, coconut, ciliega (cherry), and banana.

Chilangos is a Mexican restaurant in Providence, Rhode Island. It has giant margaritas and huge, delicious portions of meats, veggies, and everything between. Closest Rhode Island has come to genuine Mexican food.

Mmm, I want some right NOW.

Oh, Ladurée. Oh, Pierre Hermé, how I love you so. This day was filled with glorious, glorious macaroons from these two patisseries in Paris. If I have one economic splurge (besides Mariage Frères tea) this trip, this is it.

Aside from that, other highlights of my gastronomic tour of Europe so far include:
–Falafel at L’as du Fallafel
–Gigantic pistachio macaroon from Paul
–Duck confit and a gigantic salad with smoked salmon and foie gras at Le Relais Gascon
–Fig yogurt

Only five more days until my program starts in Hong Kong. I am getting tired of traveling with only one other person. I suppose, if her personality clashed better with mine, then we would have a better relationship. She talks too much, too loudly, her personality is too strong for me to bear. She is a little too [self-]righteous, too opinionated. I cannot say something without her saying, “I know,” or disagreeing. She gets annoyed at me very easily. I do not know how to please her

Yesterday, we spent the day in the desert. We paid 75 RMB each to rent a camel, have a few “tour guides,” and some blankets to spend the night in the desert. While we were still at the edge of the desert, the “small boss” (as he called himself) would talk to us, saying things that made both of us uncomfortable beyond belief.

“Are you tired?” He would ask.
Unknowing of the actions that would ensue, I responded, “Yes.”
He started to massage me. “Okay, okay! I’m not tired anymore. Thank you.”
“You are very beautiful. If you are tired, I give you massage.” I ran away, and much of the afternoon revolved around avoiding this horrendous man.

At night, we walked into the desert, except we forgot a flashlight. Using our cellphones (so modern!) we found a place on top of a dune to settle down. As the sun set behind the hills of sand, we played a game where they cover your head, and then someone taps/hits you, and you have to guess who it was. If you fail after three chances, you have to sing a song. God only knows how long we played that silly game. The Uighurs could have played this game forever, it seemed. The two of us got bored by the 10th round. This night was also the first night I saw [several!] shooting stars.

Foods I have tried thus far:

Fresh figs
?? zhua fan
?? la mian – hand pulled noodles
? (naan) up the wazoo
Orange prickly fruit with pink insides
Fresh yogurt
Fresh ice cream
Xinjiang pears

Stomach: 8, Toilet: 0

Again. Tonight I went out with Gao Ying, a former teacher and current friend, and we had a lot of barbecued meat. We had bbq chicken wings (the BEST), lamb, tendon, and mantou (steamed bun). The night before she and I (and another friend) had Korean BBQ in Wudaokou, topped off with a drink at a swanky Japanese bar.I really cannot go on eating like this. If I do not exercise consistently, my metabolism slows to a crawl, and I can turn spinach into fat. Obviously, with Beijing (slash China)’s air quality, I don’t think you’ll be seeing me doing much exercise.Here’s to health.

I like my coffee with no sugar and a lot (really…a lot) of milk, half and half, cream. Never sugar, though. To me, sugar alters the taste of coffee. Milk softens the intense punch coffee has. It makes the coffee go down smoother, reminds you of ice cream. Ice cream reminds you of happy, carefree childhoods where caloric intake wasn’t an issue; where germs were ingested freely; where living and learning taught you lessons you take with you for life (e.g. do not attempt dangerous feats without proper protection).MILK :: COFFEE as ___________ :: LIFEa) LAUGHTERb) HAPPINESSc) PUPPIESd) LOVEe) ALL OF THE ABOVE